Is There a Stranger In Your Closet?

August 26, 2010

Who do you see when you look in your closet? Is your mother’s face smiling back at you from that ruffle shirt you’ve never worn?  Or, is your best friend’s favorite dress hanging out in there taunting you?

Most often, in response to the question, “Who do you see when you look in your closet,” I hear:

  • My mother
  • My sister
  • My best friend
  • Myself, pre-children
  • Myself, pre-30 extra pounds
  • Myself, pre-menopause
  • Whoever was working at the store the day I went shopping
  • The store window mannequin…
  • All of the above!

Is this true for you?  If so, what is the first feeling that comes to mind when you open your closet to get dressed? Exhaustion?  Overwhelm?  Denial?  Frustration?  Dread?  Some combination of all of these?  Rarely, under these circumstances, is it joy and delight.

Guess what?  When you look in your closet you want to see YOU…just you. That part of you that makes you smile, that reminds you of fun times and delicious memories (maybe the memories are of pushing your daughter on a swing, lunch with girlfriends, a successful business presentation, or a precious date with your sweetie – these are the simple pleasures that make up life).  You also want these feelings to be reflected in every aspect of your wardrobe down to your nightgown and slippers!

If you’re shaking your head in despair or frustration, you are not alone.  Most women will admit this is easier said than done.

So, let’s shake things up a bit.  Let’s begin to weed out those garments that make you roll your eyes or cringe.  They have absolutely no place in your wardrobe.

Evict the Strangers:

  1. Remove one item from your closet that feels more like someone else than you. If you are near your closet go there right now and do this (if not, take a big piece of paper and write down the first thing that comes into your mind so you’ll remember to remove it later). Even if you don’t know why it isn’t you or what to put in to replace it…the very first step is to get it out of there.

As long as it is taking up space in your sacred closet (yes, this is where your essence is expressed every day!), you will feel over burdened, frustrated, annoyed, despairing or resigned to all of those feelings every time you get dressed, and none of that is good.

It is also very likely that you aren’t wearing those things anyway – it’s more like a security blanket but the security is a sham.

  1. Identify one garment or outfit that makes you smile the second you put it on. It can be a dress, pair of pants and even a pair of shoes or scarf — no item is too small or insignificant.

Lay both of these garments side by side and have a piece of paper handy (your Nurturing Beauty Journal will do perfectly if you have your home study program “Who Taught You How To Dress?”)

For the outfit that isn’t you, write down everything about it you don’t like. Be as picky as you can be.  Maybe it’s the way the fabric feels?  Perhaps the buttons seem overwhelming or there are just too many of them?  It could be that you dislike the pattern or the way it clings or it has a belt and you don’t like belts.  Write down everything!  (If there are a few things you like about it, write those in a separate column.  Maybe the color is pretty if it weren’t so shapeless.)

For the outfit you love, write down everything you like about it. Color, texture, fit…maybe it makes you feel sophisticated, down-to-earth or pretty.  Whatever it is, write it down.

These lists are your lifeline the next time you go shopping.  Don’t leave home without them.  The next time you try on an outfit, run down both lists and compare the garment.

This exercise alone will help you stay focused when you shop. It is so easy to get distracted by all the choices, the lighting, or the helpful “advice” from sales women or your shopping buddies.

Sometimes, your desire to find “something” is so great that you settle for the best of what you find which often doesn’t really measure up to anything even close to fabulous – and that’s what you are shooting for!

Now, take a long, deep breath…this is just one step in creating a wardrobe you love.

How did this exercise make you feel?  Encouraged, hopeful, excited or like, yikes, now what!  If you feel like this is just the tip of the iceberg for you and you need a super jumpstart before you have to buy your Fall wardrobe, then I want to invite you to learn more about the upcoming Fashion Fairy Godmother workshop.

The Fashion Fairy Godmother workshop is a 2-day, action-packed workshop that will completely revamp how you shop, get dressed and change how you view your wardrobe and personal style forever!

“I haven’t felt this confident about my appearance in years!” This is what Kathy Wilk said after attending the Fashion Fairy Godmother retreat in the spring.

BONUS OFFER: As a very special extra bonus, when you are the first person to register by Monday, August 30, you will receive a $50 gift certificate to Jewelry by Karel (she will be there with her jewelry on Sunday when we’ll talk about how to accessorize using all the information you’ve learned the previous day).  Get this special bonus right here: www.fashionfairygodmotherprogram.com

MORE BONUSES: When you are either the second or third person to register by Monday, August 30, you will receive a $25 gift certificate to Jewelry by Karel. Believe me, this is one of the most treasured bonuses (and you’ll see why when you’re there!).

If you are not sure if the Fashion Fairy Godmother workshop is for you or just what the next best step is for you overall, simply fill out my “I Need Help” form (https://totalimageconsultants.com/i-need-help.shtml), and we’ll set up a complimentary ‘Discover Your Style’ phone consultation.

Whatever you decide to do, now is the perfect time…before you are perusing your Fall wardrobe and wondering what you can possibly wear to get you through the next 6 months!  Imagine instead feeling empowered and joyful about the transition!

Share this post:

Learn how to stop wasting money on things you never wear.
Get Ginger's free e-book and bi-weekly newsletter with fashion secrets.